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Releasing Expectations

Last February when I signed up for The World Race, I had expectations of this 11 month mission trip to 11 different countries. It was going to be amazing, stretching, educational and spiritual! Little did I know that it would look nothing like what I thought. 

Much like everything else in the world, COVID turned my year upside down and just continues to surprise me. My team and I set out in January for our 11 month adventure starting in Nicaragua. Having an amazing month and creating beautiful relationships to kick the race off. I was super stoked after this month and I couldn’t imagine how it would get better than that! 

Month two was our first all squad month in Costa Rica. All 12 of us were together doing ministry and living in San Jose and then moved to Jaco. This month was crazy busy and jam packed, but still so amazing and full of forever memories. I was getting the hang of living out of a backpack in foreign countries. Really diving into the missionary lifestyle of $4 a day food budget and limited contact home. Then we got news of a route change. Our original route was to Chile next, but due to political unrest we were rerouted to Peru. No big deal, that’s pretty normal in race world. 

Yay!! We are in Peru..how fun?! Teaching English as a second language, trying ceviche and getting used to South America. We got word that AIM was starting to bring racers home due to COVID (I had no idea what that was at this point, no cell service and only access to Spanish newspapers) but we had nothing to worry about. We were still being monitored 24/7, but we should be fine in Peru. 

Two days later, we were told our race is over and we will be back in the states within 72 hours. WHAT?! I had no idea what was going on, everything was happening so fast and the craziness had just begun. 

Our flights were booked to leave Peru 2 hours before their boarders shut down. We thought we were golden and going to sneak out just in time. Then our flights got canceled in the middle of the night, people were working behind the scenes to get new flights while we all slept and had no idea. One of our Squad Leaders came in at 5 am and said we had an hour to pack and leave because we have a new flight leaving this morning. (we were scheduled to leave at 10 pm that night). In a panic, we start throwing things away, packing our bags and collecting out personal belongings. 

We were in Lima, a city of 10 million people and their government had just released a stay at home order. The only cars allowed on the road were emergency vehicles and airport taxis. It was a ghost town. So eery, early morning fog and not a soul in a usually busy city. When we pulled up to the airport it was like a scary movie; people were wearing masks, news reporters running around, police officers and security guarding everything. We couldn’t get into the airport unless we showed out passport (AKA, you can’t come in unless you’re leaving the country). Long story short, we made it on our flight after more chaos. 

The plan was to fly to the DR where we would have a 24 hour layover and then to Atlanta to have a 3 day debrief of what the heck just happened. So we get to the DR, exhausted in every way possible and we get a hotel (PRAISE GOD). We just hung out, tried to get our minds off of our circumstances, worshipped, cried and all the things to just be together. 

We woke up the next day to gather our things, worship again and headed to the airport. As we entered the most Americanized airport we had come across, people were wearing masks and temperatures were being taken. We were welcomed by Pizza Hut, Burger King and some familiar chains that we hadn’t seen in a few months. It started setting in that we were really going home. We got to our gate ready to board and head to Atlanta for our 3 day debrief when we got news that America had a new restriction to no more than 10 people in a gathering and our debrief was canceled. So when we landed in Atlanta in 3 hours, we were told to book our flights home. We thought we were going to have 72 more hours together at least and now we have 3 hours. 

Thankfully, we got to stay the night in a hotel in Atlanta once we got there so we could fly out the next day and go our separate ways. Our mentor welcomed us with pizza and hugs (P.S. American pizza is soooo salty). We just sat in her room in silence, laughter and tears realizing tomorrow would be the end of our race as far as we knew. 

A few of us didn’t sleep at all that night, we stayed up and hung out, wrote letters, talked about everything and soaked in all the time we could. The next morning we all flew out at different times, I was in the first group to go so we had our morning goodbyes and shuttled off to the airport. I dropped a few of my squamates off at their gates where tears were shed and uncertainty of when I would see them again. 

I boarded my flight and there were 12 people joining me on this journey from Atlanta to Indianapolis. COVID reality started setting in. I walked through the airport and was greeted by my dad where I lost it honestly. The first thing I said to him was that I didn’t want to be there. I was not transitioning well. I was returning to a home that wasn’t how I left it. People were going crazy over toilet paper, businesses were shut down, riots were breaking out, new guidelines on how close people could stand, masks, and a nation full of fear.

We set up weekly video chats with the squad and our teams to stay in touch and continue our race to the best of our abilities. We were all praying for an international relaunch and kept getting no response from leadership on what was next. The end of May is when were projected to get a “plan” on what the end of our race would look like. Fast forward a few months, we decided to stay together as a squad no matter what it looked like so we relaunched July 1 on World Race America. We got to stay with our coaches for the first month which was so important. We finally got to sit in the same room and unwrap what we had walked through. 

WRA looks different than 11n11 and we had to learn that as we went. We would be moving every 10-14 days, we have our own transportation now, I was stepping into my new role as Team Leader, everyone speaks English, we set up our own ministry schedule, we all had phone service and so much more!

WRA was a beautiful journey, I got to meet such amazing people including our hosts who I have bonded with greatly. One of our hosts baptized me (Shoutout to Austin) and one of our hosts is moving to Indy (Ayoo Caleb). I got to see how God showed up in amazing ways and provided so much. We got numerous meals provided from strangers, hosts or fellow Christians, free places to stay, discounts on housing and gifts from hosts.

Life in missions is just trusting God and living with open hands. What is planned probably won’t happen and that’s okay!

For example, we are ending our race all locked in a house in quarantine because my squamates got COVID. Not how we thought this would end, but it’s how it is ending. At this point, we have really let go of all expectations even though sometimes God really had to strip that away and it hurt. But, it’s all about trusting His faithfulness in the process.

Our race by no means was anything we thought it would be, not even a little bit. But, we still learned about the Lord’s goodness and got to see His glory in amazing ways that we never thought possible. 

I wouldn’t change a single thing about this year. It was challenging in so many ways. Community living was hard, getting let down was hard, being in the unknown was hard, getting pulled off the field was hard, ministry was hard and a thousand other things were hard. You get it. This year was difficult all around in a thousand different ways. 

I love my squad through all the difficult times we’ve had. Our experience was for sure different than any other racer’s experience. 

All of that to say, God is so good and I have learned more about Him this year. I have a deeper level of intimacy and dependence with the Father due to the trials than I would if I hadn’t gone through these experiences. I have discovered so many things about myself and I know 24 is going to be an amazing year.

Thank you for joining me on this journey, I don’t think this will be my last blog post but I will be home in 2 short weeks! It’s been amazing.  

 

6 Comments

  1. I am thankful for all of the changes. I got to host some wonderful people and meet you!! I look forward to seeing you soon!!
    Love you lots!!

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